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Find Family And Friends That Believe In Your Dream And Will Encourage You To Pursue It

the joys of working from home

Image by Ben McLeod via Flickr

If you decide that the dream of  internet marketing is where you’re headed, one of your most difficult challenges will probably be in explaining your decision to the people in your life.

To this day, no one understands what I do – they all connect the words “Internet marketing” to spammer – you can’t blame them for their ignorance.  But while you may not care once you’re successful, it can be intimidating answering the questions, “What do you do?” when you’re first getting started and have nothing to show for it yet.

Sadly, friends and family are not always as supportive as you’d like when they learn you’re starting a making money from home business. This is partially due to basic brainwashing.

Mainstream society doesn’t believe in anything that isn’t taught in grade school, endorsed by the evening news, and understood at the water cooler as status quo behavior.

Another reason people might have negative things to say when you tell them you’re starting a home business is the simple fact that misery loves company. If your friends and family are all stuck in jobs they don’t particularly like, and if they aren’t making the kind of money they would prefer to have, they might resent your efforts to better yourself.

Of course, no one would ever say that, but think about dieters. You can be dieting to lose weight and you go out to lunch with your best friends and what do they do? They start talking you into those cheese fries and death by chocolate dessert.

And there’s another reason why you might get a less than enthusiastic response – your loved ones genuinely care about you (and your family). They may be afraid for you to walk away from the security of your job – or maybe they’re just scared you’ll get into multi-level marketing and hound them to join your downline at all the family events (I kid, I kid).

Seriously – this is something you’ll need to be prepared for. If you have a very supportive family and group of friends like I did, be grateful. Otherwise, use the information below to minimize drama when telling the people in your life about your pending career change.

Telling Your Significant Other

If you have a spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend, you should discuss your decision with them ahead of time. Tell them with confidence you’ve decided to better yourself and create a brighter future for both of you.

Sit down with them and go over the specific material that had an impact on your decision to choose an Internet business over other possible ventures. Let them see why this is the right choice, and help them become excited about it along with you.

Other family members may question your partner about your decision, and it’s important that you help them prepare for the interrogation. Agree on a few basic terms, benefits, and positive statements to use in conversation with other family members when referring to your new business.

Be prepared before you blurt out, “I’m quitting my job to work from home!” They’re going to want to feel secure in this plan, too – so make sure you explain how much research you’ve done, what your odds of success are, and how the two of you will revisit the situation and milestones you reach over time.

Also, your significant other needs to join you in the business frame of mind. It might take awhile (as in several months) for your enterprise to start making money – and they should be well aware of this fact.

I was lucky – my husband agreed about me not returning to work and we were both thrilled when my income skyrocketed and I was able to stay home.

If you have kids, this is a real perk you can mention to those who ask – you’re working at home to be able to raise your kids yourself! Who can argue with that?

Telling Parents and Family

Parents and elderly relatives sometimes don’t understand why a person would leave a paying job to start their own home business. They view such efforts as foolish, and may even believe you’ve been “taken” by some sort of scam.

Try to tell yourself they mean well when they pressure you to give up and get a “real job.” The bottom line is, you’re an adult and you’ve made a decision. They can either support you, or you’ll need to limit discussions about this topic whenever you’re around them.

Internet marketers don’t need seeds of self-doubt planted in their minds. They have enough pressure on themselves as it is.  Protect yourself from criticism.

Telling Friends and Other Associates

Your true friends will tell you that they believe in you (even when they don’t) because they want to share in your enthusiasm. A legitimate friend won’t call you a “spammer” (many people think this about everyone who works online) or otherwise give you a hard time.

You should feel free to be open with your friends and associates about what you’re doing. To be honest, who cares if they have a problem with it? If there are people in your life who offer negative insight about your new profession, you should ask yourself a simple question:

Does what this person thinks really matter? If they actively try to harm my enthusiasm, do I really need to have them in my life?

As you walk the entrepreneur path, you’ll discover that you’re best served by associating with other motivated, positive individuals. You’ll find yourself increasingly impatient with negative people, and will have little or no desire to be around them.

Yes Debra… But what about “Getting Your Spouse Marketing Online”?

This is funny… at least it is to me. Hope you enjoy the story:

I told you how shocked my hubby was to see that “he” had a few websites of his own. I put up some websites that were written by “him” (actually they were all me). But it must have hit a nerve somewhere.

He already knows I’m earning “real” money marketing online. (He sees the income statements and checks) 🙂

I know that he is really tired of me telling him that “he will have to work forever – because he can’t retire from his business”.

You see – after 25 years of working for the “man”… (that would be IBM) he was forced to take an “early retirement” (that means layed off – forever).

He was to “old” to get a job that paid well and that began the journey (for him) in starting his own business.

He does well… but it’s still a “job”… If he doesn’t “go to work” – he doesn’t make money. The idea of “working” until he is “really old” 🙂 is not his cup of tea.

He knows that my goal has always been this:

Earn enough income so that he can “retire from his business”. But… he also knows that it takes time – effort – and more time for me to reach that goal. (Remember… I’ve always said “No Easy Button”).

What must have happened – He finally realized that if he was working on building an online business – just as I was doing – the goal of “early retirement” would come much quicker. Really??? Go figure…

A few days ago he sat down next to me with his coffee and said – ” Will you show me how to do this online marketing thing”.

Ah…

Ah….

Yep… he had to pick me up off the floor.

Then I was calm – cool – collected – “Sure Honey… I’d love to”!

You must understand one more thing… For several years – I’ve dragged this poor guy all over the country. I’ve made him take the same “classes” at blogging and marketing conference’s as I do… I spend hours talking about my work… I’ve told him about all the challenges, mistakes, highlights and winning moments. And still – I could not get him to try one thing.

But… put up one tiny website with his picture as the “author” and BAM! I’ve got him interested.

So guess what he’s going to be doing? Eventually – He will be working on his own niche ideas.

Of course – I made him pick a “new” idea to work with.

One thing we did have to “TALK” about was that age old complaint: “When will I find the time”?

You know how well that conversation went… sigh.

Good Grief! I hear that from many of my coaching students… “I don’t have the time” – which usually translates into “I want an Easy Button”.

Years (I mean YEARS) ago – when I was teaching “How to start a Craft Business” classes… I heard the same complaint – “I just don’t have time”.

My answer was (and always will be) –

  • Get up a bit earlier in the morning
  • Get off the couch – (TV time will have to be limited)
  • Go to bed a bit later at night
  • Cut out some of the extra activities – Like fishing, dunes, camping, hunting etc.
  • Commit to spending at least 2 hours per day “Learning” the business of online marketing.

When you have a “goal” – and you must – it really is easy to find the “TIME”.

Debra Does Have A Goal (And Now It’s Hubbies Goal)

The storm was over and now my hubby is on board.

I have a picture posted right next to one of my computers.

Just a picture… no words. This photo is of a travel trailer sitting right on a beach in Mexico.

It’s my dream – goal – that someday we (hubby and I) will be able to sit in our travel trailer on a beach and work on our business.

This is not a lofty – pie in the sky – goal. I am not one of those that thinks I can make hundreds of thousands of dollars a day… I don’t want to be the “guru” on stage… I don’t want staff and a huge office…

My (now our) goal is to “replace” his portion of our income with online marketing income – instead of “Got To Go To Work” income.

The real beauty of an online business… is …. if one or both of us gets sick or unable to “work”… our income is not affected.

Plus… we will have more of the work outsourced or done by Virtual Assistants as time goes on. That means we (hubby and I) can sit on the beach and NOT have to work on our business. It will all be on auto-pilot.

I had a comment on the Perks of  Making Money From Home article yesterday from Stew:

Yes, Debra.


One of the hardest things I’ve found working at home is finding family and friends that believe in your dream and will encourage you to pursue it. So often you feel isolated.


I think our education system deliberate fosters the idea of “go to school this many years to get that kind of job”, the entrepreneurial spirit is frowned upon because the system values conformity

I guess I’m different in that I saw education not as training for a job (just over broke) but as a way to become an intelligent human being who could add value to society.

I hope this article helps Stew!  And I hope it helps you to Find Family And Friends That Believe In Your Dream And Will Encourage You To Pursue It.

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Comments

  1. Stew Kelly says

    February 10, 2011 at 10:39 am

    Thanks for sharing Debra.

    Yes, I strongly believe in what I am doing, and that belief has been an immense help dealing with the doubters and nay-sayers.

    Even though I may not have support from family or the friends I know now, I truly believe it will pay off in a more rewarding and enriched life in the end.

    It’s not how you start the race we call life, but how you finish. Just the idea of choosing the path I will run gets me jazzed in the morning.

    You see my focus is not on making a million dollars, though it would be nice, but on making a difference in this world. My greatest reward would be having someone, someday, say…my life is different and better because Stew was alive 🙂

    Reply
    • Ken Mason says

      February 10, 2011 at 1:51 pm

      Stew,

      Great observations. Wish you the best of everything in life.

      Reply
  2. Ken Mason says

    February 10, 2011 at 1:50 pm

    Debra,

    This article really is a punch in the gut for me. I really understand the issue of your friends and family sort of deserting you and your dreams and desires. My spouse (I love her dearly) takes the approach that it is all a scam, and I am just wasting my time and money. Sometimes her comments really hurt and make me question my goals and dreams. I end up sitting quietly working at my projects. When I have a little success at something I only have my kitty to cheer me on and when I have a failure, I just suck it up and move on by myself. I only hope someday that my wife would say, “boy this is really working for you, can you show me how you do that so I can quit my job”. Stew you are also spot on. When you leave this earth it would be nice to have someone say, “boy he/she sure made a difference in a lot of peoples lives” than “I wonder how much money he/she left their heirs?”. Great article Debra!

    Reply
  3. Roy says

    February 10, 2011 at 5:08 pm

    “What are you doing now?”
    I’m transitioning to a new career – Web site designing.
    “Great. Could you design a site for me that……………”
    Sorry at this time my client doesn’t allow outside distractions.
    “How many clients do you have?”
    Just one.
    “What if they fire you or lay you off or end your contract?”
    I’ve taken a solemn oath to never, ever fire myself.
    “Oh”

    Reply

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Debra Conrad, helper@debraconrad.com, 340 W 32nd St, Suite 153, Yuma, AZ 85364

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